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This Is Why We Still Don’t Need #WhiteGirlsRock

This Is Why We Still Don’t Need #WhiteGirlsRock

This was an interesting read. I didn’t know what to expect given the title of this article, but the points made were completely valid. Black Girls Rock 2015 aired last night and I encourage you to Google the speeches of the recipients last night. They each were poised, elegant and provided loads of encouragement. For now, check out the article below about the controversy Michelle Obama is receiving for the encouraging words she spoke to the women and girls in the room.

KT

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In 2013 I published an article here on The Huffington Post called “Why I’m Not Here for #WhiteGirlsRock.” In it, I posed a question to my fellow white Americans who were upset about Black Girls Rock!, insisting that a program centering the self-worth and self-love of black girls must be “reverse racism” at work and taking to Twitter with the hashtag #WhiteGirlsRock to “reaffirm” the value of white girls. The question I posed was:

What in your heart recoils when you see Black Girls Rock? What bone in your body sees empowerment for black girls and thinks “that’s not fair?” Where is your bitterness rooted? What do you think has been taken from you when women of color are uplifted?

Now I’m afraid I must ask again, because very little seems to have changed since 2013: Black Girls Rock! is again being criticized. You see, Michelle Obama spoke at this year’s Black Girls Rock! celebration. She said many beautiful things, among them:

No matter who you are, no matter where you come from, you are beautiful. I am so proud of you. My husband, your president, is so proud of you. We have so much hope and dreams for you… I know there are voices that you are not good enough. Each of those doubts was like a test that I either shrink away from or rise to meet. And I decided to rise.

Her comments (somehow) have prompted outrage and anger, like this bit of… something by Amanda Shea, who claims that Michelle Obama’s beautiful words of love and kindness send the message that “white girls don’t matter.” Let’s think about this.

Yesterday, Cosmopolitan came under fire for an article in their online magazine called “21 Beauty Trends That Need to Die in 2015.” In it, beauty trends are categorized as either “Hello, Gorgeous” or “RIP,” ie. rest in peace. Twitter arose in protest when it was noticed that the “Hello, Gorgeous” column failed to include a single woman of color with the exception of Nicole Richie. Any model with skin darker than hers was placed in the “RIP” column, opposite to a white model in the “Hello, Gorgeous” column. Even more baffling is the fact that the beauty trends the article claims to be contrasting are often too similar or subtle to discern any real difference on first glance, so rather than there being a striking make-up technique that is clearly hideous or tacky, we are left with one readily apparent difference: race. “Hello, Gorgeous” to the white girls. “RIP” to the black girls.

Defenders of Cosmo are eager to jump at the fact that there are white women in the “RIP” column as well. This is true, but missing the point. The point is that the reverse is not true for the “Gorgeous” column, thus the Eurocentric standard for beauty is visibly maintained. A woman of any color can be ugly, this tells us, but only one specific kind of woman can be beautiful.

Why does it matter? Why does it matter what races are depicted as beautiful vs. ugly in one of the most widely read women’s magazines in the country? Because:

  • Studies show that consumption of TV increases the self-esteem of white boys but decreases the self-esteem of girls and black boys.
  • Researchers estimate that at some point before they reach 17 years of age, four percent of black teens and more than seven percent of black teen girls will attempt suicide.
  • Eighty-seven percent of runway models are white.
  • Black girls and women regularly experience punishment and ostracization for wearing their hair natural.
  • Of the top 100 grossing films of 2014, only 11 percent of the women onscreen were black.
  • A repeat of the infamous “Doll Test” of the 1940s revealed that 47 percent of young black girls interviewed preferred to play with white dolls because they were “prettier.”

It’s a subtle kind of murder, the killing of black girls’ self-confidence. In a culture like ours that regularly dehumanizes and denigrates the bodies and identities of black women — even the First Lady of the United States isn’t exempt, after all — it’s easy to miss the often indistinct ways that black girls and women are cast as inferior to the identities and pursuits of white women. The role of the sassy black sidekick in movies, for one. Little microaggressions like this. Women’s magazines are misogynistic on their own in the way that they pit women against one another with vicious, idiotic (and viciously idiotic) contests like “Who Wore It Best?” but when black women almost always lose, there’s another layer (an intersection, if you will) there that speaks to the double-edged sword that women of color tightrope-walk their entire lives.

I see it, too, in the criticism of last week’s Dreamworks release, Home. I saw the film and loved it. The entire audience in my theater loved it and applauded when it was over. Twitter loved it. But a look at RottenTomatoes.com reveals harsh criticism that brings to mind the old “must be twice as great to be considered half as good.” One reviewer remarked “Girl power and diversity aren’t enough to make a great movie” or something similar, and I’m reminded of the power of privilege when it comes to representation in American media. As I said to fellow white people in my original article about Black Girls Rock:

“[White people] are in everything. Ninety-nine percent of Hollywood movies feature your faces. Ninety-nine percent of magazine covers are covered in you. The Emmy Awards and Oscars are almost entirely you. If you Google ‘beautiful people’ the screen is covered in white faces. Black girls (and boys) are taught from birth that there is one version of beauty, and it is you. Many black girls go their entire lives thinking they are ugly, thinking they need to be lighter, straighter, whiter in order to have value. Everything that you see every day that reaffirms your whiteness; every commercial that has a nice white lady embodying the perfect “mom;” every magazine that has blue eyes and bone-straight hair; every Hollywood blockbuster that has a leading lady with skin never darker than Halle Berry… all of these things are reinforcements of your identity that you take for granted.

Home is priceless for these three little girls. Because in what other animated world has a girl with skin and hair like theirs been represented? Princess Tiana was a frog for 95 percent of The Princess and the Frog. In Home, a little black girl is literally the key to interplanetary unity, yet critics like the white faces I see on RottenTomatoes can’t even begin to see how much this might mean to black girls everywhere.

One need look no further than last year’s backlash against Quvenzhané Wallis for starring in the remake of Annie to see why Black Girls Rock! and all manner of specific uplifting of black girls is necessary. I’m sure we all remember the racist attacks that accompanied Amandla Stenberg being cast as Rue in The Hunger Games as well.

Even in my own work, I’ve received emails from well-meaning (white) fans questioning why I chose to make the protagonist of my first novel a woman of color. I had an agent at a writing conference ask me if I’d be willing to change her race to make her “a little more mainstream, a little more relatable.” The agent never said “white,” just “mainstream,” the assumption being that whiteness is the unspoken default, the thing to which everyone else must assimilate, or “RIP.” Remember when Kendrick Lamar dropped To Pimp a Butterfly and Slate asked how white fans should approach it? No one ever asks the same about black fans subjected to the likes of Taylor Swift or Justin Bieber. Assimilate. Assimilate, or RIP.

It’s maddening, really: the refusal of this ambiguously named “mainstream” to realize the power of black media and black money. As Shonda Rhimes and other black-led programs continue to see record-breaking viewership, as Home brings in millions more than anticipated, Rihanna’s character Tip isn’t even included in the Happy Meal toy set: just the alien. Even more disturbing, the advertisements for the film have been found to only feature images of the little girl in neighborhoods that have a mostly black demographic. In other (whiter) areas, only the alien and the cat are depicted. The same thing was done with advertisements for Annie.

The first black heroine in a Dreamworks film: You’d think it would be a brag-worthy highlight plastered on every wall. But somehow we still live in a world where an alien whose skin changes colors when he’s lying is still more relatable and “mainstream” than a human being whose skin is only ever one color: brown.

A question for Amanda Shea and anyone else who believes that the beauty and value of white girls is under attack: Did advertisements for Frozen hide Elsa? Do white girls get sent home for wearing their hair the way it naturally grows out of their heads? Do white girls turn on the TV and struggle to find a face with their skin color, hair texture, or eye color?

No.

I wasn’t here for #WhiteGirlsRock in 2013, and I’m not here for it now. As Michelle Obama said, there are enough voices telling black girls they’re not good enough. I will not be one of those voices. And meanwhile, critics continue to yell, “But it’s hard to be a girl of any color! White girls attempt suicide too! White girls are subject to unfair standards of beauty too!”

Yes, I know. I’m a white woman. I know how hard it is to be (or identify) as female in a world bent on our subjugation. But part of sisterhood means acknowledging that all of our sisters walk different paths and face unique challenges. One of the challenges we (white women) do not face — no matter how you cut it: size, shape, ability or education level — is representation.

So I’ll repeat myself, for everyone bent on standing up to shout down those of us who recognize the value and necessity of uplifting black girls in a world that would rather they “rest in peace:” sit down. Please sit down. Michelle Obama is on and you’re blocking the screen.

Olivia Cole is an author, blogger, and bigmouth. She published her first novel, Panther in the Hive, in 2014.

This article and image are found at http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6999318

 

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Easy and Quick Hair Tips

Easy and Quick Hair Tips

I found a really neat article with pics about different easy hair tricks to use when you’ve just run out of ideas.

hair tips2 hair tips3

There are more ideas at the web link below.

http://www.minq.com/style/8161/22-super-easy-hair-hacks-that-will-get-you-out-the-door-faster#slide/4

🙂 Phee

Article and pics from minq.com.

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in Random Sips

 

Nick, Mariah, and the twins on Easter

I love to see when co-parenting goes right.

Nick and Mariah may be battling out in their divorce but are showing you can still co-parent with some sense.

nickmariah

The twins are soooo cute too!  Monroe and Moroccan are so very loved!

nickmariah1

Hunny, I don’t believe for one, single, solitary, quiet second that Mariah Carey was baking anything!

Her personal chef was about to pour that cupcake mix and said, “hey Mariah, come act like you’re pouring this batter and baking and we’ll put it on instagram”.  LOL!!!!

🙂 Phee

Pics from popsugar.com

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in Random Sips

 

Hair Crush

Hair Crush

These beautiful sisters are currently celebrating the upcoming nuptials of the youngest. As you can see, they know how to rock their hair and they are also not afraid to switch it up. Check them out on IG, FB, and YouTube @mynaturalsistas.

👍 KT
image

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in Naturally Me Sips

 

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Kylie Jenner Upsets the Internet….Again!

Kylie Jenner Upsets the Internet….Again!

Kylie Jenner has done another eye-brow raising photoshoot.

Some internet people think Kylie is wearing “black face” but I don’t think so.  I see a BEAUTIFUL and ARTISTIC picture of Kylie.

These pictures are on fleek as the kids say these days.  In other words, they are the bomb.com if you ask me.

kylieblackface2kylieblackface3

Kylie responds to the backlash by saying there were lights that made her appear like she had a black face.

To me it looks like silver face.  Maybe one the silver surfer should be mad but not me. LOL! silver surfer

🙂 Phee

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/05/kylie-jenner-blackface_n_7007132.html?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000592

Pictures from the article on huffingtonpost.com and the top-10-list.org.

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in TV and Movie Sips

 

First Family On Easter

First Family On Easter

I love, love, love me some Michelle and Barack!

They’re girls are growing up beautifully in the White House.

Look at their dogs.  They look like fake dogs because they’re so curly and pretty!

Happy Belated Easter!!!!!!

🙂 Phee

Pic from the huffingtonpost.com.

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in Random Sips

 

Jill Duggar’s In Labor….Finally!!!!

Jill Duggar’s In Labor….Finally!!!!

Finally, finally, finally baby Dilly is about to be born.

Jill is having a home birth and she is currently 41 weeks and 5 days pregnant.

First of all, I thought you couldn’t go more than 40 weeks?

I mean technically, you are never 40 weeks pregnant because when they give you your due date it’s adding in 2 more weeks when you weren’t preggers.  Never understood that.

Anywho, Jill should have her baby by now or she may still be in labor.  I was in labor with my first born 23 hours!!!!!! Then, I still had to end up getting a C-section.

I guess there will be a spin-off show chronicling Jill’s pregnancy and birth of baby Dilly.

Clawd have mercy!  There are going to be soooooo many shows with all them kids.  Baby Dilly grows up.  Baby Dilly gets a new brother or sister.  Baby Dilly goes to kindergarten.  Jessa and Ben have a baby. Child 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 gets or courts and the engagement.  LOL.  Child 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11….kids.  The list goes on and on and on ……..

Congrats Derrick and Jill.  We can’t wait to see your new baby boy’s fingers.  LMAO.

You know nowadays, people post pics of their baby’s hand or foot never the face first.  We get that months later.  tee hee

🙂 Phee

Pic from ETonline.com.

 
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Posted by on April 6, 2015 in TV and Movie Sips

 

Daily Inspirational Sip

Daily Inspirational Sip

Live.Love.LAUGH

These Vine clips are pretty funny.

Enjoy!

 

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The Man Who “Discovered” ADHD Makes a Startling Deathbed Confession – Complete Health and Happiness

The Man Who “Discovered” ADHD Makes a Startling Deathbed Confession – Complete Health and Happiness

“ADHD is a prime example of a fictitious disease.” These were the words of Leon Eisenberg, the “scientific father of ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder),” in his last interview he gave before his death at age 87 in 2009.

(While some have described Dr. Eisenberg’s statement as an “exaggeration,” many doctors are coming to the belated conclusion that ADHD is often “over diagnosed” by the use of “fuzzy diagnostic practices.” Harvard psychologist Jerome Kagan, who is one of the world’s leading experts in child development, states:

“Let’s go back 50 years. We have a 7-year-old child who is bored in school and disrupts classes. Back then, he was called lazy. Today, he is said to suffer from ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). . . . Every child who’s not doing well in school is sent to see a pediatrician, and the pediatrician says: “It’s ADHD; here’s Ritalin.” In fact, 90 percent of these 5.4 million kids don’t have an abnormal dopamine metabolism. The problem is, if a drug is available to doctors, they’ll make the corresponding diagnosis.)

Eisenberg made a luxurious living off of his “fictitious disease,” thanks to pharmaceutical sales. Coincidentally, he received the “Ruane Prize for Child and Adolescent Psychiatry Research. He has been a leader in child psychiatry for more than 40 years through his work in pharmacological trials, research, teaching, and social policy and for his theories of autism and social medicine,” according to Psychiatric News.

Yes, it was even admitted that they are his THEORIES. The medical industry is using the guise of helping children to depersonalize and disconnect our children from a healthy, normal upbringing. Parents are placing their children on these drugs and subjecting them to what the world has to offer, when in fact all these children are looking for is their parents in hopes of being the blessing that God intended them to be.

In the United States, 1 out of 10 boys among 10-year-olds takes medication for ADHD on a daily basis . . . with increasing tendency.

American psychologist Lisa Cosgrove and others reveal the facts in their study “Financial Ties between DSM-IV Panel Members and thePharmaceutical Industry.” They found that “of the 170 DSM panel members 95 (56 percent) had one or more financial associations with companies in the pharmaceutical industry. One hundred percent of the members of the panels on ‘Mood Disorders’ and ‘Schizophrenia and Other Psychotic Disorders’ had financial ties to drug companies.”

And they are reaping major benefits from this “fictitious disease.” For example, the assistant director of the Pediatric Psychopharmacology Unit at Massachusetts General Hospital and associate professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School received “$1 million in earnings from drug companies between 2000 and 2007.”

Marc-André Gagnon and Joel Lexchin, a long-time researcher of pharmaceutical promotion, performed a study which shows that the U.S. pharmaceutical industry spent 24.4 percent of the sales dollar on promotion, versus 13.4 percent for research and development in 2004. That is almost twice as much money to push their drugs on people than the amount to research to make sure it they’re safe!

This raises the following question: Are they safe?

Read the antidepressant black-box warning for yourselves, and you will be alarmed by the side effects listed on the inserts:

– Confusion

– Depersonalization

– Hostility

– Hallucinations

– Manic reactions

– Suicidal ideation

– Loss of consciousness

– Delusions

– Feeling drunk

– Alcohol abuse

– Homicidal ideation

Why would parents subject their children to drugs with such noted dangerous side effects?

Dr. Edward C. Hamlyn, a founding member of the Royal College of General Practitioners, in 1998 stated, “ADHD is fraud intended to justify starting children on a life of drug addiction.”

Source: Political Outcast via RealFarmacy.com

This picture and article can be found at
http://complete-health-and-happiness.com/the-man-who-discovered-adhd-makes-a-startling-deathbed-confession/

 

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Twins? Nope, Total Strangers

Twins?  Nope, Total Strangers

Imagine moving somewhere completely different and everyone is calling you by someone else’s name and they think they know you.

This happened to Neil Richardson over in Europe.  He moved to Braintree, Essex and people kept calling him John all day long.

Finally, he ran into his virtual twin John Jemison.  It is unbelievable how much they look alike and are not related in any way!  Identity theft would be so easy when you like exactly like someone else and you’re not twins.  LOL

They are both different ages but have a lot in common in terms of their past.  Both men proposed to their wives after knowing them only a week, went to the same college, and taught religion.  Oh yeah, they use the same bank too!  They better watch this part carefully.  LOL

twins

They say all of us have a twin out there.  I wonder if I can find mine.

🙂 Phee

Pics and article from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/01/doppelganger-neighbors-john-jemison-neil-richardson_n_6985120.html?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00000592  .

 
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Posted by on April 5, 2015 in Are you Serious Sips