Let me just say, I am in no way condoning cheating on your significant other, but I am also not ignorant to the fact that it happens every single day. My issue is with those who do cheat without protection and then go back home and infect their faithful and devoted mate with an STD or create a new bill in the form of child support. All these babies being born from this irresponsible behavior is just wrong. Those kids deserve both parents and when they grow up and learn how they were conceived, they will feel some type of way. Not everyone who is caught cheating immediately becomes single because of a little thing called forgiveness, but to add a child is insult to injury. Cheaters…stop…think.
At this time, we all have access to statistics and right now the number of people being infected with HIV has increased by 50,000 each year. There are currently 1.2 million people infected with HIV. And catch this, 1 in 7 people are unaware that they are infected. Did you hear that? 1 in 7 are oblivious and will sex you real good with a clear conscious all the while you both now have HIV. This number is sad because there is no reason someone doesn’t get tested or protect themselves. I’ve been married for almost 7 years and been with my husband for 9 years. I have slept with only him during this time. Neither one of us were a virgin when we got together so before he ever entered me without protection, we were both tested. As a matter of fact, we still get tested because certain STD’s can lie dormant and not show up until several years later. I’ve always used protection, but dudes are slick and will slip that condom off or poke holes in it. Ladies and Gents, don’t let them trap you. Always have your own protection readily available. Check out the STD facts below compiled on cosmopolitan.com and pay special attention to the incubation periods.
Visit http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a54/STD-fact-sheets/ for complete details on each of these STD’s.
CHANCROID
WHAT IT IS: A bacterial infection that results in sores on the mouth, throat, lips, anus, tongue, vagina, or penis.
HOW IT’S CONTRACTED: You can get chancroid sores or spread them through skin-to-skin contact with open sores, from hands that have touched a sore, or from sex toys such as a vibrator or dildo that have touched a sore.
TESTING: Chancroid lesions can look like syphilis or genital herpes, so a doctor needs to analyze the discharge from the sores to get an accurate diagnosis.
INCUBATION PERIOD: 12 hours to five days
SYMPTOMS: Painful open sores on the genitals, and, in some cases, swollen and tender lymph nodes in the groin area. Women may be less likely to get the sores; instead, their symptoms may include painful urination or defecation, painful intercourse, rectal bleeding, or vaginal discharge.
TREATMENT: Antibiotics are usually effective.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: The sores that remain from an untreated chancroid infection may put you at risk for other STDs, as well as other types of infections.
CHLAMYDIA
INCUBATION PERIOD: One to two weeks
SYMPTOMS: Chlamydia often has no symptoms at all. But signs of an infection can include burning during urination or vaginal or penile discharge. Women may also have pain in their lower belly, painful intercourse, or bleeding between periods. Men may have swelling or pain in the testicles.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Women with chlamydia who don’t seek treatment are at the greatest risk, because the disease may lead to pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), a serious infection of the reproductive organs which can cause infertility and life-threatening complications such as ectopic pregnancy and difficulties during pregnancy and birth. Pregnant women who don’t take antibiotics to treat the infection can pass it to their infant, which usually results in either conjunctivitis (an inflammation of the eyes that threatens eyesight), or pneumonia. These babies are also at risk for prematurity and low birth weight. For men, untreated chlamydia may cause inflammation of the testicles and sterility.
PUBIC LICE (CRABS)
INCUBATION PERIOD: As long as a week if it’s the first time you’ve had pubic lice; as little as a day if this is a recurrence.
SYMPTOMS: Itching in the genital area or any other part of the body with hair.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: If you don’t seek treatment you’re likely to pass pubic lice on to any sexual partners, or anyone else you’re in close contact with.
GONORRHEA
INCUBATION PERIOD: One day to two weeks
SYMPTOMS: About half of the women who have gonorrhea have no symptoms. Women’s symptoms can include discharge from the vagina, frequent urination, pain or burning when urinating, and pain between periods. Men are most likely to experience pain during urination and discharge from the penis.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: In women, not being treated can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease (PID) or an ectopic pregnancy, which can in turn result in infertility or life-threatening complications. Other problems can include arthritis, heart problems, and for babies born to mothers with gonorrhea, serious eye infections.
HEPATITIS
INCUBATION PERIOD: Two weeks to five months, although hepatitis C can remain dormant for 10 years before symptoms crop up.
SYMPTOMS: When symptoms are present, they are much the same for all five types of hepatitis: mild flu-like symptoms, light stools, dark urine, jaundice (yellowing of the skin and the whites of the eyes), fatigue, and fever.
Hepatitis A symptoms may also include nausea, vomiting, and abdominal pain.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Because types A and E usually go away over time, neither is likely to lead to chronic disease. Types B and C, however, can lead to cirrhosis (scarring of the liver) and liver cancer if not treated; type D can also result in liver cancer.
HERPES
INCUBATION PERIOD: Usually five to twenty days
SYMPTOMS: Herpes simplex virus-1 usually shows up as cold sores or blisters. For those who have herpes simplex virus-2, some have no symptoms, while others may show signs of an infection from five to twenty days after having sex with an infected partner. Early symptoms can include a burning sensation in the genitals, low back pain, pain when urinating, and flu-like symptoms. A short while later, small red bumps may appear around the genitals or on the mouth; later these bumps become painful blisters which then crust over, form a scab, and heal.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: While herpes is not life-threatening, and not all people who have it suffer from outbreaks, those who do experience outbreaks find that topical medication eases the pain and can help speed recovery when blisters appear.
HIV/AIDS
INCUBATION PERIOD: Some people develop symptoms shortly after being infected, but for many it takes more than ten years for symptoms to appear.
SYMPTOMS: Most symptoms of AIDS are not caused directly by HIV, but by an infection or other condition brought on by a weakened immune system. These include severe weight loss, fever, headache, night sweats, fatigue, severe diarrhea, shortness of breath, and difficulty swallowing. The symptoms tend to last for weeks or months at a time and do not go away without treatment. In some cases, infections result in death.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: HIV progresses more rapidly into full-blown AIDS without treatment, usually because of infections that develop as a result of the patient’s weakened immune system.
HPV/GENITAL WARTS
INCUBATION PERIOD : One month to several years
SYMPTOMS: Many types of HPV have no symptoms, though some cause visible genital warts that may be found in the vagina or urethra or on the cervix, vulva, penis, or anus. Rarely, they are found in the mouth or throat. Warts are often flesh-colored, soft to the touch, and may look like miniature cauliflower florets. They usually grow in more than one area and are often painless, although they may itch.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Since there are strains of HPV that are linked to cervical cancer, failing to seek treatment can be fatal. But since many types of HPV are basically harmless, they need only be monitored with yearly Pap smears (or more frequently — every three to six months — if a result comes back abnormal).
If genital warts are allowed to grow without treatment, they can block the vagina, urethra, or anus, and become very uncomfortable. Depending on where they are on the body, genital warts can cause sores and bleeding. An increase in the size and number of the warts is also more likely during pregnancy and when a person’s immune system is compromised by diabetes, an organ transplant, Hodgkin’s disease, or HIV/AIDS, among other conditions.
SCABIES
INCUBATION PERIOD: As long as a week if it’s the first time you’ve been infested; a day if it’s a reocurrence.
SYMPTOMS: Signs of a scabies infestation include intense itching, or small bumps or a rash on the penis, between the fingers, on buttocks, breasts, wrists, thighs, or around the navel.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Continued scratching can cause an infection, and left untreated, scabies can be transmitted to anyone you come in close contact with.
SYPHILIS
INCUBATION PERIOD: One week to three months
SYMPTOMS: During the first stage of a syphilis infection, painless sores or open ulcers may appear on the anus, vagina, penis, or inside the mouth, and occasionally on other parts of the body. During the second stage (roughly three weeks to three months after the first symptoms appear), an infected person may experience flu-like symptoms and possibly hair loss or a rash on the soles and palms — and in some cases all over the body. There are also latent phases of syphilis infection during which symptoms are absent.
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Untreated syphilis can lead to serious damage to the brain and the nervous system; mental deterioration; a loss of balance, vision, and sensation; leg pain; and heart disease. A fetus is at particular risk if the mother doesn’t seek treatment; the chances for stillbirth and serious birth defects, including blindness, are very high.
TRICHOMONIASIS
INCUBATION PERIOD: Five to Twenty-eight days
SYMPTOMS: Men often do not have symptoms of trichomoniasis and usually do not know they are infected until their partners need treatment. But when symptoms do occur, they include: Irritation inside the penis, Mild discharge, Slight burning after urination or ejaculation
Many women do have signs or symptoms of infection. Symptoms in women can include: Greenish-yellow, frothy vaginal discharge with a strong odor, Painful urination, Vaginal itching and irritation, Discomfort during intercourse,Lower abdominal pain (rare)
IF YOU AREN’T TREATED: Trichomoniasis in pregnant women may cause premature rupture of the membranes that protect the baby, and early delivery. The genital inflammation caused by trichomoniasis might also increase a woman’s risk of acquiring HIV infection if she is exposed to HIV. Trichomoniasis in a woman who is also infected with HIV can increase the chances of transmitting HIV infection to a sex partner.
Wowza. Does anyone have these symptoms? Go get checked! TODAY!! I am one who agrees that a person who infects someone should be prosecuted for endangering the life and fertility of their partner because they willingly cheated during the course of the relationship. It’s just not fair, if you have to cheat, leave that person alone. Let them link up with a like-minded individual who will be faithful and loving. The only part about being single again, dating and having sex is now they will need to consider new birth control methods. For your convenience, I’ve included a list below from http://www.contracept.org/stds.php. Don’t forget the dental dams too since they are not on this list!
Contraceptive Method |
Bacterial Infections |
Viral Infections |
Condoms |
Usually protective |
Protective, but not for HPV |
Spermicides |
Not Protective |
Increases risk of HIV |
Diaphragm |
Protective against cervical infection
Can facilitate vaginal bacterial overgrowth |
Protective against
cervical tumors |
Oral Contraceptives /
Hormonal Methods |
Increases risk of chlamydia and gonorrhea |
Increases risk of HIV |
Withdrawal |
Slightly protective |
Slightly protective |
IUD |
Increases risk of pelvic inflammatory disease (PID) |
Not Protective |
Fertility Awareness |
Not Protective |
Not Protective |
Cervical Cap (FemCap) |
Potentially protective against chlamydia and gonorrhea. Research currently underway. |
Potentially protective against HIV. Research currently underway. |
I wanted to bring up this topic because of a show on Oxygen; Prancing Elites. One of the gay male dancers has been experiencing some health issues on the show and it was revealed this week that he contracted HIV from his boyfriend who cheated on him. This is what he had to say,
“I’ve never been boy crazy,” Davis said, explaining that anger was one of the emotions he’d been carrying. “I did everything I was supposed to do in my relationship. I thought I was in a fairy tale. I thought I was in happily ever after. And then I was cheated on.” He could feel sympathy for “wives, husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends” infected by unfaithful partners, he said.
Keep your head up Kareem! You are in our prayers! Regardless of his sexual orientation, this could happen to anyone who is sexually active, shares intravenous needles or shares sex toys!! Be careful people and if you suspect your mate of cheating, confront them before you end up with an incurable disease. Cheaters…stop…think….leave…and protect the one who loves you even if that means losing them.
KT